Real paper. Real stamp. Real petty.
Some petty deserves
a stamp.
Real letters for when you care just enough to be formal about it. We put it on paper, seal it in an envelope, and drop it in the mail. Starting at $5.
No subscription. No account. Stamp included. No return address, unless you insist.
The arsenal
Pettiness, professionally delivered.
Snarky Letter
- Your grievance,
- Crisp white paper
- Plain envelope, return address optional
- First-class US postage
- Unsigned unless you sign it
Middle Finger Card
- A hand-drawn middle finger on the front
- Your message inside,
- Premium cardstock
- First-class US postage
- Says everything before they even open it
Escalate if necessary
A decorative wax stamp on the envelope. Nothing says "I mean this formally" like sealing wax.
Real cotton stationery instead of plain paper. Still going to ruin their day, just more elegantly.
How it works
You type it. We make it official.
State your grievance
Type your formally petty message. Profanity allowed. Hate and threats are not.
We put pen to paper
Your words, on crisp white paper. Sealed with wax where instructed.
The mail does the rest
Sealed, stamped, and mailed first-class within 1 to 2 business days.
House rules
Snarky letters must be passive-aggressive, not actually aggressive. We screen for hate speech, slurs, explicit threats, and harassment. This is for gag gifts and formal pettiness, not targeted abuse. Messages that violate this policy will be rejected and may be reported.
Who tested your patience this week?
Put it in writing. Formally. It takes two minutes and a first-class stamp.
Send a Snarky Letter